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Saving You by Crimson Twilight

Summary: This is a cleric of Paladine's POV. It is her recalling a special moment during the War of the Lance. Guess who/what "you" is.

When I first saw you, our eyes met only for a fleeting glimpse. You were one of those "refugees," caught in a war and unable to get out. You never had a chance. I felt for you, was being sympathetic from my perch on the temple steps. You couldn't leave this mess.

I'd dust off my no-longer pristine robes, dirty with the fingerprints of children and the sorrows of war, help some old woman up the stairs and into the temple, and then. . .

You were still there, at the edge of the grounds. It was as if you all too well the boundaries of this life, the holy barricade only one of many.

I couldn't help but stare into your eyes. They revealed pain, sorrow, and. . .concern? A chilling kind of helplessness? Clouds were darkening on the horizon. Rain was beginning to spatter on you, on me, on the little, fair-haired child sleeping at your feet.

I jumped when I saw her. Small, with a long shock of golden hair, she was hurt. You knew this. The fact that you carried her as far as you did still astounds me. I feel guilty at wondering why you brought her with you, with your armor, your weapons, your supplies that were far too few for you both.

She stirred and you gently scooped her up in your arms. Her hair fell back, revealing pointed ears. An elf. An elven child. You were a marvel. You saved her.

You sought out my gaze again and tried to convey a silent message. I walked forward, slowly, as if approaching a wild animal. Because that is how I saw you, some beast with a baby in his arms.

Your eyes were your humanity, your redeeming quality. They were a window to your soul. I saw your soul as black as pitch on the outside. You knew this. You didn't deny it. You were hurting and you couldn't help this. It wasn't your fault. It's the inside that counts, and you had something inside of you that few had in those days. You saved her.

You told me that the child needed help. You knew whose lands you were in. You wouldn't get out but that was no matter. The Abyss suddenly sounds fun once you've been through this war. It is hell, to you, to me, to the little girl fearlessly laying her head on your shoulder.

You ask if I'd take the girl. I said yes, what else could I say? Who am I to refuse a child? I held out my arms and you relinquished the little one. I saw the gash on your side, the one that had cut through your clothing and armor and had been slowly killing you. Did you want it to?

You looked at me, at the child you had carried for miles and then you took my hand. You gave me the something in your soul. I smiled and carried the girl to the temple. I looked back to see you draw your sword.

Lightning flickered on the horizon and you found my gaze and smiled. Your hope was with me now. I would treasure it always. I turned the child's face away from you but didn't try and stop your actions. I couldn't return the favor you gave me. I couldn't save you and I didn't want to. It's better you do this your own way. You drove the sword into yourself and died in the cold rain. I wasn't sorry.

Everyday, someone questions me about the girl. She asks about you always. What am I to tell her? She is a sweet child, polite and intelligent. The people smile at me and admire me for rescuing her. But I didn't save her. You did.

Crimson Twilight, 2002.
Ok, I know you might have your own speculations on who "you" is, but in my mind he's a Bozak draconian. "I" is a priestess of Paladine.

Webmaster's Note: This submission was made at Saturday, April 6 2002 12:43:46 PM +0500 to my previous web site, The World of Krynn. Sorry for the delay.